Forgive & forget.
‘Do you like my present?Teddy’s heart was suppose to be missing but i think he had found his heart back to you.I hope that you would put it on top of your piano and when you see teddy,you’ll think of me.’ He says.
‘Hmm,i dont think its a good idea.Crystals are fragile and they’ll break easily.I think i’ll just keep it safe in the box.’ She said.
But deep down inside she knows,it isn’t the crystals she wanted to protect.It was her feelings,her sadness for those awful memories that happened,she was trying to burried it deep down just like how she’s going to keep that crystal teddy bear in the box,leaving it untouched forever.She wanted to forget bout the past,and everything.But only when this crystal has to be out of her sight,and its too beautiful to destroy it.
‘Can you give me a hug?’ He asked,but she refused to,cause she knows she has to let him go.
‘Its late,you should get going now.Don’t let them wait too long.‘She says bitterly.
There,he left.Warm tears were rolling down her cheeks.
Who knows the night of my birthday will end like this.PATHETIC.I had doubts when i was writing this,but now i don’t.Because i’m so sick of assholes lying their teeth off and everyone thinks that i’m the bitchy dramatic ex trying to ruin some happily ever after relationship my ex boyfriend’s having which was a lie.I think i should just stand up for myself once,or maybe twice.
If i’m treating him good,i’m just being cruel to myself.And why on earth should i offer him a heart full of mercy when he doesn’t even have mercy towards me?!
Many of you might be thinking,’why this girl like that one?!’ Her ex boyfriend treat her so good,and now she’s trying to write a post to ruin him.
Sad to tell you,your good looking prince charming weren’t the mr.nice guy you’ve seen in my blog years ago.Now he’s the biggest loser i’ve ever seen in my life.Yes,and i’m referring to my we-used-to-be-very-lovey-dovey ex boyfriend,Sun.Yes,i know its not a good idea to blog about him at this hour because we’ve nothing to do with each other anymore.But i think i’ll regret for the rest of my life for not letting it out.
THIS IS MY BLOG AFTERALL.I can write whatever i want.
Occasionally,he’ll text me messages that tell me how much he misses me and how much he still loves me and he can’t forget me after the break up.His new girlfriend were just merely a replacement to heal his broken heart.And to be honest,sometimes i’ll get influence by his messages and i will think that how nice if we’re still together.But i don’t really bother to reply,or maybe i’ll just make a joke and laugh it off so that things wouldn’t be so awkward.Till then once,it was November and it was his birthday,he invited me out for a date on a Sunday night for movies and dinner to celebrate his birthday(He has a girlfriend okay.)
And he has this house party going on,on Saturday night and he says he couldn’t invite me because his girlfriend’s going to be there so that he wanted to date me out on Sunday night.So what am i going to be?!The third party who sneaks out with him without his girlfriend knowing?!!How ironically could it be when a used-to-be-girlfriend innocently became the third party.OF COURSE I SAID NO.Although i really really wanted to hang out with him to see if we still deserve a chance but it wouldn’t be fair to his current girlfriend.And i told him if we’re only friends,he should invite me to his party instead of dating me out on a Sunday night without letting his girlfriend know.
And after this whole ‘he wanted to ask me out for a date’ thingy occured,he tells me that he wanted to break up with her and eventually he did.But in the middle they were on and off.He told me that he sympathize her and he felt so guilty to her,so he asked me to wait for her exams to be over and he’ll break up with her and patch back with me. And i really did wait.
Sometimes he would ask me to his house for dinner,tell me how much his mum misses me and we did have dinner a few times.And he could just lie infront of my face whenever she calls him.Do you know how i feel?I felt like crap.And he would ask me not to post our outings on twitter or whatnot,incase she knows about it.
I knew that he was lying to me cause he never ever thought of giving up her nor me.He just want both of the girls i guess,and practically we,the girls are like oysters on the plate and he’s still choosing which is fresher and bigger.I know that he was just holding me on so he could get both of the girls.
I told him i quit,i wanted to move on already.Then he lied to me that he was already single and even prove to me on his FB status that he was single.
EVERYTHING WAS A LIE.And the girl on the other side doesn’t know bout anything till i called her and tried to sort all the mysteries out.
He knows that i’ll still wait for him no matter how,so it doesn’t really matter if he’s out there having fun with other girls.Till then when he’s bored of them,he’ll come back to my side.I DON’T WANT THIS KIND OF PERSON TO BE MY BOYFRIEND.
Really.And i don’t want a coward like this to be my boyfriend either.So i moved on,and i really treated him as a friend only.Whenever he sees that i’m moving on,he holds me back.But whenever i’m ready to commit and give him another chance to try,he’ll just turn me off and ask me to wait.
What’s enough,its enough.He wanted another chance(which already been given alot of times) on my birthday party,but i guess i’m already immune.He calls me eventhough i’m so far away,and like old times,he lied to her.Suprisingly i was strong enough to walk away from someone i really really couldn’t give up on.It might hurt,but this is a process of healing i guess.
Now everything’s clear enough,i guess he’s going back to the girl’s side,because he knows that there’s no hope that i’ll be with him anymore.
Sometimes i just wish that i could give her a tight slap on her face so that she would be totally awake and ask her to stop being delusional because she deserves a better guy.She doesn’t deserve to be the spare tyre or replacement that she shouldn’t be.
But i heard love is blind.Go live your happily ever after.
What happens on year 2009 stays in year 2009,there’s always a reason why people like him didn’t make it to my future.
I should be glad.Its not like i’ll die without having a boyfriend right?Who knows i’ll find someone better?
P/S:To everyone of you out there,sometimes you can’t just protect your boyfriend blindly without knowing the situation.IT MIGHT JUST HURT YOU MORE.And if you think that other girls are seducing your boyfriend,please tie him up in the cannal and look after him.It might be better,or not.Because you can’t make a drama scene when there’s only one actor on stage.I might look like a fool for writing this post,but it doesn’t really matter anymore.
Btw,forgive&forget?Hell yeah.Forgive myself for being so stupid and naive,and forget that he even existed in my life.
Sometimes you might seem strong for keep holding on,but it really takes much more strength to just let it go and move on.I might sound agressive at times,looking tough and strong like nothing in this world worries me much..If i could lift it up,i could put it down..
But deep down inside,i’m just a girl.
Edited*
If anyone of you tend to leave harsh comments saying that i’m trying to spread rumors or yada yada..I don’t think its a very good idea,the only person who had the conversation is me,him & her.Well unless they want to cover up the truth and say i’m trying to ruin their relationship by spreading this big fat rumor,i really have nothing to say.But…phone messages and records might explain better.Do i need to say more?
And please read twice before you want to judge me,afterall i just thought it would be a very good lesson to share with my female readers.Is there something wrong?
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
xo.
you are sux!!!useless girl..
I almost tear! while I was reading this entry ;( ! maybe you have almost the same situation with me last time. My ex boyf used to did that to me. When chances are given, he did not want to appreciate. When I decided to move on, and he wants me back. Is really tough though but times really heal. I know you can do it! :) sometimes, I do think single is really fun! ;) cheers!
absolutely agree to wat u saying…
coz faced such sucks situation before…
tears drop when reading dis post…
a great post…
hope u will standing up very very soon…
be tough girl…:)
Great saying! You are brave! I love this post and totally understand how you feel.
May the new year bring you more happiness! <3
Joline
delete my comment huh??sux girl
Good job gal.. Tat is really true!
Good luck to u in the brand new year..
Yes. Time heals. He doesn’t deserve a sweet girl like you.
Just screw him!
What a brave girl !
Moving ON ! :”)
Dear Bell,
There’s no point to mention your ex here.
Past is past, unless unforgivingness. But still keep his repute.
Anywhere, enjoy new life. It’s new year.
Happy New Year
I can feel you.
stay strong ,
never ever let a coward brings you down.
Be strong girl =)It could be real tough at first and it’ll get easier each day once you’ve made up your mind. There are always ups and downs in life, suffer transforms a stronger us..
Guess you’ve gone through the hardest time.Look forward girl, time really cures! XOXO
Honestly i admire ur braveness…
Go on gal..U deserve a better person !!!
I like your lessons learnt i.e.
“Lesson learnt no.1: ‘Leopard will never change its spots.’
Lesson learnt no.2:’ The world doesn’t revolves around you.’
Lesson learnt no.3:’Live for yourself,not for others.’
Lesson learnt no.4:’Do not let your emotion takes over you. ”
Especially the no. 3 & 4 prolly coz I was having the same issues. Still in the midst of metamorphosis though. People learn, people change, people improve!Get going Belle..
[thing]Yes i might suck,but it doesn’t prove that you’re better than me.And OBVIOUSLY,NO you’re not.
[Fibiee]Awww,thanks!Time will heal everything =) I already started to give a chance to single life already!
lol. the guys dont LOOK like such a slut wei
he look so…innocent i can say
bt is actuali a bitch inside. creeepy :s
n i tink he either listen too much or misunderstood the meaning of the song “two is betta than one” mayb u shud teach him. lol x)
so nw u’re nt wif tis sucks-his-own-balls guys anymore!
happy n proud of u! ;D
hav a blast in newyear eve ya! *wink*
you are one brave girl i tell ya!
that guy is not worth your time AT ALL!
you did the right thing.
stay strong
Have a great new year =)
I’ll share some photoshop info that can make a fat person slim and enhancement of a womens’ inner beauty. Ha ha that sounds so corny.
Anyway this is just a phase of life everybody goes through. Watch out for another one during the end of college years and the beginning of your new career. That’s another phase! The next one after that?, I’ll share when I get it through there.
Cheers :D
Support…Support… You definitely deserve a better one.
虽然我觉得你做的都对，但是，要走出来两年多的感情真的很难的，你得加油，不能乱乱找避风港来疗伤哦，知道吗？=）加油加油~muacks。
good job..just leave him behind..
pity the girl friend, know nothing bout his lies..
我喜欢你 :) 加油.
pfffttt… puke on the bf. haha.. you deserve someone better =)
but mistakes are part of life so, better late than never? =D
(ps. i’m not daphkisses)
Love to read ur blog.
i have the almost same situation wif u too. Guys always wants to hav more choices. I called the girl why she wanna be the third party? she told me tis is not she wanted & hang up my phone. Radiculous answer! When my bf wants to break wif her, she started so mean to me tat she asked somebody to call me up & scold me in rude words. So much annoying phone ring me. She even cheated my bf tat she suicide & she is in the hospital. Tis is the most sucks flirty bitch in the world! Till now she still flirt wif other guys. Girls out there, pls look after ur bf especially in club.
Lastly, be tough girl. I know u can get through tis =)
After reading, I felt like I must comment on this post. *Thumbs up! Felt like you had become so strong already and I’m glad you did a good job.
I wonder how his gf feeling when she read your post. Feel sorry for her… btw, u did the good job, i wonder how brave enough u can wrote all your feeling in this post. thumbs up!! It’s should be more comfortable after you threw the all rubbish in your heart~
I had the same situation as well. And yeah you are right about ‘it is better to let go than holding on to it’.
Wish you all the best girl. :D
And Happy New Year!
hugsss *with lots of love*
be tough, stay strong ^-^
wishing u a great life ahead~
Happy new year!
thanks f0r sharing ur experience…
its useful for those gals who blind in love
u’r GREAT…u awake…
congratulation…
there’r still many trees…in the jungle
WAITING FOR U
OR EVEN MORE BETTER ONE
GAMBATEH!!!
HAPPY NEW YEAR
great post!!
i admire your bravery to put on this post..
cheer up nomatter what throws u ahead.
the better one will come soon..
You’re really brave!
Move on and never look back!
cheers :D
cheers up girl :) wanna cry for this post la :’(
stay strong, kick their ass off! :D
Cheer up! Its a new year ahead! :)
heyya, :)I don’t know whether you remember me but we did met a few times before. hehe. Anyways, I had a friend who happened to be in the same situation as you, only she did not let go, she was tied to that guy. :( I really hope your post can help her. To add on, you are one strong girl and you have fabulous friends around you. :) I’m sure you will do fine. :) Bravo on the post and yourself. :) HUGS
happy new year! :)
u are a strong and mature gal..great post..i admire u!
ignore those -ve comments..
just move on and be strong..stay positive..u deserve sum1 better :)
Add Oil Girl..
Stay Strong..
good luck in 2010… =)
Hey Bell,having seeing some bad comments about this post, I feel the need of leaving a comment to tell you how meaningful this post is. It surely serves as a reminder to all the female readers out there and to tell all these guys that girls deserve anything better than them. I am a silent reader and I read all your post from blogspot back then. I am sure as hell you improved and you are really a better person now. Btw, you said you went for an english course after SPM right? Was it in British Council? I would like to know that is it really helpful? Cause I am afraid that they might focus a lot in grammar and stuff and not the writing skills part. I would very much appreciate it if you kindly answer and thanks for even reading this.
Happy new year!!
ps: I think you are really gorgeous! Bare in mind that this compliment is from a girl and not a stalker guy k? LOL
hey, is me again…
congrate to u for able to forget him..
stay strong!
I am in the same situation as what you mention.
You are brave~♥
Happy New Year.
Cheers~!
Happy New Year to you!
Belle, am one of your reader. Im actually having the same situation with you. Just that im with him almost 4 years and we dragging each other for a year plus after our broke up. He gave me fake hope saying that we will get back together and asking me to wait and the consequences of waiting is seeing him being with another 1 now. He did apologies to me but it is not a word of SORRY can cure everything. It cause a breakdown on me and all my friends and families was so worried about me. After reading your post, i was thinking why this lil girl can be so tough but why not me? Thanks for your post, I get myself to wake up from the nightmare and looking forward for my future. I believe we deserve a better one. People don’t appreciate our hard work, it’s ok. At least, deep down in our heart we know that we never owe them but they do.
Cheers, and you have got a real sweet smile. :)
hey dear, you’re adorable. & you deserve a better dude! :)
stay strong bell!!been ur loyal readers for years.i totally agree wuf all the things that u said!love u!!we’re support u no matter wat happens =)
happy new year!
support u ^^..
http://www.dreamycreamy0622.blogspot.com/
just want u to read what he said..whatever it is..whatever it was…it’s past… dont hurt each other anymore…leave things behind :) you will be fine…
believe it or not..everything happens for a reason….there is no right or wrong in love…but when it ends…just let it be……dont hurt each other like now…
I read ur blog…i dont mean to be mean to u or what…I just hope u understand..what goes around comes around..so if u think he is wrong just let it be..he will get this so call karma….i only see HURT now..coz u both are really hurting each other deeply…letting go is hard, but keep the good ones and let go the bad ones…. he reveals so much of things and u reveals so much of him and come to the end what is the point? there is nothing left :(
life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets,
so love the people who treat you right and forget the one who don’t
Believe that everything happens for a reason
If you get a chance, take it
If it change your life, let it
Nobody said that it’d be easy
They just promised it would be worth it
Do it and never regret of not doing it later
not trying to judge..just hope that things will be fine for u and him soon :)
i have been ur silent reader for awhile now.anyway i feel u dear.i have more/less been thru the same situation as you,but the stupid part is,i only found out all of it after i decided to break up with him as he was being very shady for soo long.my intuition was so dammn right,when the 3rd party opened up the story and like you i also wanted to slaap her as she is soo damn delusional ,believes and him and THINKS SHE CAN CHANGE HIM.although i was nice enuff to tell her,she deserve a much better guy den da piece of ass plus she herself who have unconvered the lies.bodoh.some girls are just too blind,and too soooffttt.
so yes past is past.wise up and keep ur head held high,dun ever ever let him get to again,no matter how sweet he may sound / be.
cheers to 2010.
Since silly China cant bloody access into blogger twitter nor fb shall wish you here! HAPPPY NEW YEARRRRR BABBBBEEEEYYYY!! Can’t wait to reunite in a couple of days! *pelukcium*
p/s you don’t suck one bit. *winks* IMY!
its very obvious his feelings for u isn’t that serious, how on earth can he be with another girl so fast the moment u guys broke up…that just doesn’t make sense.
replacement my ass! that doesn’t give him an excuse to cheat another girl again merely just to heal his ‘broken’ heart.
and is the other girl a slut? it gives me the impression that she is damn desperate and found a gold mine that she need to cling on.
there are much much better guys out there and u deserve better ones…there isn’t a need to hurry things ;)
this is a good post.
Because it tells everyone his true colours, so no one will fall for his lies.
Although its mean, but this info benefits others.
Seriously, some guys are jerks.
This is why i dont trust guys.
When they are with you, they treat u like they love you forever.
But when they are not with you, they totally think that you dont exists.
They always lie and lie..and when girls seduce them, they will always fall for it.
Ok maybe only 1 out of 10 guys will not fall for it.
Its never easy to find the right guy.
Sometimes it takes 2 years, 3 years, 4 years to realise that the guy is not the right guy for you.
But u definitely know you’re capable of finding a better one.
Just let time heal and stay happy always.
All the best to you :)
Be tough girl!!! All the best.. U’ll get another better guy…^^
I just broke up with my bf (or ex?) a week ago…
Actually it was he who ditched me…
I read your post… I would never say you were silly… For holding on to such a guy…
And I strongly agree with what you have written- to let go and move on is more difficult then holding on… We need even more courage to do that
I wish you are fine now
I’m still in a mess but somehow one day, I’ll finally figure out what to do
Happy 2010. May God bless you =)
hugsss. at least you know you deserve a better one!
btw, i love this post!
happy new year!
Inspiring entry, I was pretty lost and having the same problem with you. You kinda guide me though. Thanks, definitely someone better for the both of us
i thought he d admit everything in his post ? just that he eloborate longer to the reader wat u r hiding…
if only i’m as strong as u are..
i’m in a situation just like yours..but i think mine’s worse coz it’s a long distance relationship.
till now i’m still waiting..it’s like i know things won’t work but yet i tell myself maybe there’s still hope for me and him.
u’ll find someone better.. :)
Forgive & forget? pft. then why are u still blogging about all these when you say u wanna forget? it’s over, no one’s talking about it anymore & u’re digging back the past. you think by posting all these bullshits up could ruin sun & tiff’s relationship? ok whatever, even if sun treated you like bullshit, there isn’t a need to post all these stuffs up. oh what do they call it again, attention whore much?
the fact is this is all over. you can move on now because clearly, you haven’t. stop posting up things like you’ve move on and whatnot when you haven’t. if you’ve moved on, you wouldn’t be bothered to type this long post -____-
go join the drama club
[Whatsoever]Its my blog,i could post what i want.Its isn’t for you to judge should i post it up or not,after all..Attention whore much?Hell yeah.Isn’t what you do the most?Posting a comment to get my attention.Yes..I’m talking bout you.ATTENTION WHORE.By the way,it doesn’t mean i can’t move on by typing a bloody long post.It doesn’t even matter if its all over,because the fact is a fact.So what’s wrong of me for blogging bout the fact?
Btw,read my post twice before you acted like a total smartass judging what i’ve posted up.
[Leon]Sun,nice try.I don’t have to hide anything you know.And now,SCREW YOU.
Isabella
i really praise you with your brave move to bare the pain for a better future…i have not much comment on your ex relationship..just at here for the 2010 new year wish you have a brighter future and get a BETTER guy instead of him(if he is what you describe as in the blog)….stay cheer up…
Whatsoever
isabella is rite that her blog she like to blog anything is her right…is sun that type of guy as what isabella describe that is a disgrace for the male’s community but if it is the other way round also the facts and reality of what actually happen sun and isabella will know and GODS KNOW…
support you! =)
last time this post seems to be very long~ u edit it again?
reading ur blog helps to improve my English!hehehe..
gonna be ur blog fans d~ hahaha
Bell i don’t know what is the real story but if its like the one u mentioned,forget guys like him.
let them rot together . U told her that she deserves a better guy? actually u are the one who really deserve a better guy.